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Hi! I'm the
whole company.

There is no "we". There's no team page. When this website says "our servers", it means one guy and a monthly charge he's afraid to look at.

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I'm a developer. My real job is building apps and websites for clients — that part is organised, invoiced, and comes with a proper contract and me wearing a shirt. It pays for everything on this domain.

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Then there's the other half of me, the one that has opinions about delay plugins at 2AM. That half made this website. It builds synths nobody requested, focus apps for students, and trading-card generators, then gives them away because charging $19 would mean support tickets, and support tickets would mean I'd have to be a professional about a thing I do for fun.

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So: free. Everything here, free. Right up until the Apple developer fee, the hosting bills and the mysterious subscriptions finish me off. That's the joke in the name, and it is only about 60% a joke.

Kindly Support Me.png

THE ORGANIZATION CHART

CEO — me


Lead developer — me


QA — you, apparently


Support — me, eventually


Marketing — this website


Legal — a page of jokes

1

A small idea appears at an inconvenient hour, usually mid-way through paid work.

2

I promise myself it's a weekend project. It is never a weekend project.

3

Six weeks later, there's a working plugin and no name for it.

4

It goes up here for free, and the cycle restarts before I've slept.

Things I promise

  • The free stuff stays free. No rug pull, no "v2 is now $49".

  • No email wall in front of a download.

  • No selling your data — I wouldn't know who to sell it to.

  • If you report a bug clearly, I'll actually read it.

Things I Don't promise

  • Fast replies. One inbox, one human, several jobs.

  • Mac builds on any particular date. Related reading.

  • That every plugin gets finished. Some ideas die with dignity.

  • Consistent naming conventions. Clearly.

That's the whole about page. You now know me better than most of my clients do.

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